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26 January 2017 @ 07:46 am
For kerrilee75: Back to You (Draco/Harry, PG)  
Title: Back to You
Author: gracerene
Fandom: Harry Potter
Pairing: Draco/Harry, background James/Teddy, past Ginny/Harry & Draco/Astoria
Rating: PG
Word Count: ~1,100
Content/Warnings: established relationship, weddings, epilogue-compliant, a sad lack of smut
Summary: Weddings are always an emotional affair.
Notes: Lovely kerrilee75! I had a slightly different plan for your birthday fic. Originally, it was also supposed to double as a 50 Reasons bonus!ficlet, but alas, the sex just didn't happen. I know, I was shocked too! I hope you enjoy this little thing anyway, and I hope you have a very happy birthday, lovely! :D

This fic takes place about five years after the end of All of the Time. You don't need to read that fic or any of the others in the Are You Mine? series to understand this one, but it's a lot more fun if you've read the others. :D

Thanks a ton to capitu & birdsofshore for looking this one over for me! <3

Read on AO3

"Crying again?"

Harry scoffed, but he didn't bother defending himself any more vigorously than that. His eyes were becoming a little damp. He couldn't help it. It wasn't every day he saw his firstborn and his godson get married, and to one another no less. James and Teddy were out on the dance floor now, the both of them doing some kind of ridiculous and energetic dance and looking at one another like they couldn't believe their luck. Harry's eyes began to prickle again, and his voice was hoarse as he murmured, "They just look so happy."

"Yes, they do," Draco replied, his tone low and fond.

They continued watching them dance together in comfortable silence, Draco's body a warm and welcome presence at Harry's elbow. The day had been perfect, and happiness filled Harry's chest with a heated glow. It wasn't until the music turned slow and sweet, and Teddy pulled James in for a soft, romantic sway, that Draco spoke again.

"Have you ever thought about doing it again?" He spoke quietly, and his tone was far-off and pensive.

"Doing what?" Harry replied absently.

"Getting married."

Harry's heart came to a sudden stop at Draco's words, before picking back up again at a breakneck speed. His palms were suddenly clammy, his shirt collar too tight. The shock of the unexpected question was like being hit with a full Body-Bind Curse, and he sat there staring at James and Teddy as he tried to sort his racing thoughts.

Truth be told, when he and Ginny split up, he'd never had any thought to getting remarried. He figured he'd had his shot; maybe marriage just wasn't for him. He was over fifty now, and even though he and Draco had been together for nearly five years, they'd never once discussed marriage. Perhaps he'd been a little too hasty in assuming it wasn't in the cards for them. He swallowed roughly and finally managed to choke out, "Have you?"

Draco hummed. Harry watched him from the corner of his eye as Draco picked up his wineglass and swished the pale liquid around absently.

Draco watched the swirling liquid for a long moment before finally speaking. "After Astoria and I finally separated, I swore to myself that I'd never marry again."

"Oh." Harry wasn't sure why he felt a sudden, painful pang shoot through him at the loss of possibility. He wanted to turn and face Draco, but he found he couldn't drag his eyes away from James and Teddy, laughing and twirling not ten feet away.

"You remember what it was like for me back when we were kids, don't you?" Draco continued, swirling the wine around his glass more vigorously than before. "Marriage was a prison. It was a sentence passed down from my parents and from wizarding society, telling me that if I wanted to have even a chance of redeeming myself and my family, I needed to get married, have an heir, and become a productive member of society." He laughed, a sharp, bitter sound, and Harry's heart ached for him, and for the boys they'd been back then, the choices they'd both felt they had to make. "Astoria was my best friend, but marrying her...I had to give up something of myself, had to squeeze and contort myself into a box that I wasn't meant to fit in. I couldn't imagine putting myself through that again, even with somebody I loved." Draco sighed, his brow furrowed. "How could I do that to somebody I cared for? How could I reduce our relationship to some archaic business transaction that symbolised a life I was all but forced into?" He shrugged. "I couldn't see the appeal."

Harry felt the heavy chill begin to dissipate. He hadn't realised how much he wanted to marry Draco until he'd brought it up, but he couldn't fault Draco's reasoning. Harry loved Draco, and he knew Draco loved him, too. Everything else was just window dressing. "I understand."

"No, I don't think you do."

Harry turned to look at him then. Draco was dressed in deep purple dress robes that clung to his fine form like he was born in them. Night was beginning to fall outside behind the Manor, but the yard and gardens were well lit with hundreds of floating candles and dancing fairies. The faint streaks of silver in Draco's pale hair—almost imperceptible in the daylight—caught the flickering lights, making Draco look even more distinguished than usual. His cheeks were flushed—from the wine or the conversation, Harry didn't know—and his eyes were a deep, fathomless grey that Harry knew from experience was easy to get lost in. Merlin, Harry wanted him. Harry wanted Draco more and more each day, wanted him more than he thought it was ever possible to want another person. Marriage or not, Harry planned on spending every day of the rest of his life by Draco's side.

He spent so long admiring Draco, that he'd forgotten Draco's previous statement until Draco cleared his throat.


Draco smiled and laughed. "Merlin, the way you look at me. It's…" He shook his head, his expression turning abruptly serious, his eyes shining in the candlelight. "That's what I was trying to say just now. I never understood it before, why somebody would willingly tie themselves to another person for the rest of their lives, how marriage could ever be something more than a practicality. I get it now." He reached forward and grabbed Harry's hands in his own, and Harry's throat grew tight with sudden emotion. "So, to answer your earlier question, yes. I have thought about remarrying. You."

Thrilling, terrifying, exhilarating euphoria spiraled through Harry, sweeping away the last of the disappointment and catapulting him to giddy new heights. He was dizzy from the magnitude of it all, and he was grateful he was sitting down. He cleared his throat, attempting to compose himself.

"Shall we get married, then?" Harry said in as casual a tone as he could manage.

Draco shrugged, all faux nonchalance. "If you'd like"

Harry couldn't help it, he laughed, loud and bright and fucking incandescently happy. He grabbed the front of Draco's robes and pulled Harry in for a heart-stopping kiss that made his toes curl and his pulse pound.

They were both breathing heavily when Harry pulled away, but Harry didn't go far. He pressed his forehead to Draco's, letting the familiar scent of Draco fill him up as a ecstatic grin spread across his face. When he finally spoke, his voice was low and breathy and filled with possibility and promise.

"Yeah, I'd like."
Sabetheasabethea on January 26th, 2017 04:35 pm (UTC)
Beautiful. AWWWWWWWWWWWWww, Teddy/James.


James would be thrilled that his wedding encouraged Harry and Draco to do it, too, if he knew.
wicked smut goddessgracerene on January 27th, 2017 04:00 am (UTC)
Haha, you know I can't resist sneaking Teddy and James into pretty much everything, LOL!
kerrilee75: pic#126363776kerrilee75 on January 26th, 2017 06:01 pm (UTC)

Grace!! You made me cry!! Happy, beautiful, sentimental tears but oh my gosh. This is gorgeous. I love that you snuck some Jeddy in there. This is amazing and wonderful. Thank you so much!! I didn't miss the smut at all.

wicked smut goddessgracerene on January 27th, 2017 03:59 am (UTC)
Yay!! I'm so glad you liked this little thing, lovely! <3 <3 <3
carpemermaid: Default Dancarpemermaid on January 26th, 2017 06:01 pm (UTC)
Oh, oh, so gorgeous! I love Harry being all happily weepy over watching James and Teddy on the dance floor, and their conversation, and Draco being bowled over by how Harry looks at him! And this, guh, my heart!!! - Harry couldn't help it, he laughed, loud and bright and fucking incandescently happy.

So perfect!
wicked smut goddessgracerene on January 27th, 2017 04:29 am (UTC)
Thank you so much!! I'm so glad you enjoyed. <3
Melissa Rose_melodic_ on January 26th, 2017 08:00 pm (UTC)
Oh Merlin!!!!

Who needs an ounce of smut when you can have all the most glorious feels in the world?

Ahhhh, I love this verse so much and to see the characters come back is such a treat. Oh I so felt for Draco, reflecting on his past and what marriage had meant to him way back then. And sweet Harry, all pounding heart and racing nerves as he realized so deeply in that moment how badly he wanted to marry Draco.

Goodness, I just adore those two and their intense feelings for one an other. Such a sweet and moving conversation is grand enough but having it occur in the background of this glimpse we have into a majestic wedding between James and Teddy... well that just destroyed me!

wicked smut goddessgracerene on January 27th, 2017 04:55 pm (UTC)
Awww, thank you so much! LOL, it was definitely weird not writing smut, but the boys insisted on being disgustingly sweet instead. :D
welcome to villa cariño!capitu on January 26th, 2017 08:19 pm (UTC)
This is so completely and absolutely beautiful. This opening moment when Harry's watching these two young men who mean everything to him dancing, doing that crazy dance (so like them!) and feeling that joy and be so touched by it, it's just beautiful.

Then Draco next to Harry, feeling so familiar and this conversation that sort of sneaks upon Harry and then Draco's words, how he felt he had to give up something of himself, as great as Astoria was (and she really was!) and then how watching Draco, just being lost in him for just that moment and how that's what it was, marriage, that's what Draco realised it could be, I think, he could have that for the rest of his life, be with Harry and – they are so perfect, because

"Shall we get married, then?" Harry said in as casual a tone as he could manage.

Draco shrugged, all faux nonchalance. "If you'd like"

And it's perfect because they are sort of dying of love here and it just makes you smile, you know? Beam with happiness at this two fools who are meant to be and they know it.

Gorgeous. *happy sigh*

Yep, I'm commeting twice, i do that now! lol
wicked smut goddessgracerene on January 27th, 2017 04:58 pm (UTC)
Aww, you are just the best, lovely! ♥ ♥ ♥
Maccadole: pic#126218798maccadole on January 27th, 2017 11:12 am (UTC)

Ohhh, no, gosh, I'm melting. You made me have so many H/D feelings. What do I do with myself now? Teddy and James too! You wrote them getting married, and I'm having so many feelings about that as well. Harry as a proud and happy father dhjghghs this is too much.

That conversation. Oh gods, so lovely. I'm having feelings about Draco as an individual toooo.

I'm feeling too much.

wicked smut goddessgracerene on January 27th, 2017 04:56 pm (UTC)
Thank you!! I'm really glad you enjoyed! <3
Jaeenchanted_jae on January 27th, 2017 07:21 pm (UTC)

*cheers them on and throws confetti*
wicked smut goddessgracerene on January 27th, 2017 08:29 pm (UTC)

sassy_cissasassy_cissa on January 27th, 2017 10:23 pm (UTC)
I just have to comment here too. Gods, this is such a brilliant piece. It fits so well into the universe you've created. I have such a soft spot for older Draco and Harry and romance.

You've really captured such a great moment in time...the wedding...James and Teddy dancing and then...Draco and Harry and the spontaneity of the moment.

I adore how Harry immediately thought he knew what Draco was saying - but was ever so wrong.

Great job, hon!! ♥
wicked smut goddessgracerene on January 31st, 2017 04:57 pm (UTC)
Awww, thank you so much, lovely! I'm so very glad you enjoyed this one! <33
fantasyfiend09: Rain Postcard Red Rahlfantasyfiend09 on January 30th, 2017 02:58 am (UTC)
This is so beautiful! I love how much emotion you packed in there so that their decision to marry was rich with all their history.
wicked smut goddessgracerene on January 30th, 2017 08:02 pm (UTC)
Aww, thank you so much! <33
Bring forth the tale of dicks: curlewbirdsofshore on February 1st, 2017 09:07 pm (UTC)
Ahhh, sorry I took a while to get here, I've had so little fandom time. This really is glorious and it was a pleasure to read it again. I especially love the way you describe Draco here as an older man, still completely gorgeous.

he laughed, loud and bright and fucking incandescently happy

Top line ♥
wicked smut goddessgracerene on February 2nd, 2017 02:48 am (UTC)
No problem, hon! You gave me plenty of lovely feedback when you looked it over. <33

Thank you so much for your wonderful words, and for your invaluable feedback!
felixfvlicisfelixfvlicis on March 12th, 2017 02:40 am (UTC)

This was so stunning. I can't get over it. The atmosphere you created, the way you described Harry watching James and Teddy, it felt like I was hovering above them, basking in the blissful glow of it all. And Draco. His admission was so incredibly honest, and the fact that he's still willing to be vulnerable with Harry after all this time, the fact that it's Harry who changed his world (of course it is) ... I just, all the feels, okay?

I'm so sorry this isn't a more eloquent comment, but please know that I enjoyed this immensely. Your writing is so easy to get lost in, it sweeps me up and carries me through the spaces between the magical words that you write, that come to life on the page.

wicked smut goddessgracerene on March 12th, 2017 08:08 pm (UTC)
Oh gosh, thank you so very much!!

Aww, your comment is plenty eloquent! I'm so happy you enjoyed. I don't write non-smutty things that often, so I was a bit nervous about it. :D